Captain Melville

It must have been fate…

…because with recent events, holidays and what-not it had been weeks since my last decent burger fix.. And i was pining for something truly memorable. Melbourne suffered through some some gale force winds and horrendous weather during late afternoon, so by the time I had my hair cut and got to JW’s new apartment in Southbank to check it out it was just after 8. Now, I won’t lie. I had some truly tremendous expectations of the rebirth of Miss Lib, and Shayne McCallum behind the reigns in the kitchen was going to ensure that they delivered. Captain Melville had been on the hit list for a little while now (Sorry J, my usual burger buddy, I feel like I have cheated on you!)  so with myself and JW having pretty much nothing in our guts due to anticipation, we made the short 3km track down to Franklin St and into the belly of the beast to tackle what truly read as an interesting burger.

As, on my many occasions to burger haunts in the past (Hux, Merrywell), we began with one of Brooklyn’s finest. I was a fan, JW not so much.

Not feeling content with just the burgers, JW cased the menu and opted for the crispy fried chicken ribs, glued to the plate with some of the finest sriracha mayo I’ve yet tried.

These were a pretty interesting foray into the nights proceedings. The aroma as they were sat on the table was delectable. Such a medley of herbs, spices, and ‘just drove past a KFC’ addictiveness. These were great, a real tantaliser of an entree.. And that mayonnaise? Wow.. If anybody has any ideas if there is any reputable bottles out there, please, hit me up.

Next? Well, the draw card of course… The Captain’s Burger. Take a moment to digest the ingredients: 2 (Yes, two, though it’s not explicitly mentioned on the menu) Sher wagyu patties (And yes, I know these days it’s more of a marketing gimmick but these were genuine), double cheese, crispy bacon, tangy pickle, lettuce, and a Yarra Valley egg. Joining them together? Hands down the best brioche ever.

Just take a moment to marvel at what you see before you. It was genuine artwork on a plate, and I could go into a whole song and dance about how good it was but JW’s first words he managed to mutter when he had removed the glorious wonder juices from his face was “This is the best burger I have ever ate”. And you know what? His sentiments had merit. The brioche, to begin with, was the true highlight. Soft, a touch sweet, and with the trademark wash on the top which gave it an incredible sheen. It was like something straight out of a Vietnamese bakery.

The signature patties married beatifully to the creamy, sunny-side-up and oh-so-runny egg and the saltiness of the bacon pared beautifully with the decadence of the double cheese. If, I had to have one gripe, it was that they didn’t put the Sriracha mayo from the wings inside. But you know what? They probably don’t put it in because if they did the burger would be absolute perfection and there would be no need for any other thing on the menu. Alas.. Next time I’ll ask. Oh, without failing to mention the chips these were pretty good too. Hand cut and all. I still prefer french fries with my burger though.

Every so often a burger comes and along and presents the sorts of stuff you dream about long after. Captain Melville is that place. 2013’s new #1.

Captain Melville
34 Franklin St Melbourne Vic 3000
http://www.captainmelville.com.au/

Meals on wheels

Raph at Beatbox Kitchen

Somebody recently asked me…

Upon reading my recent ramblings about Friday night adventures: “So Stef where are you headed tonight?”  … “A van” I replied. “A what?” .. “A van. Remember those late-night kebab trawls of the noughties? Just without the, you know, salmonella…

Enter Beatbox Kitchen. I’m not sure which was established first, but the whole not-so-static setups of the likes of Taco Truck, Cornutopia et al certainly have captivated the hearts (and stomachs) of Melbourne’s adventurous. I first read about Beatbox Kitchen on my favourite burger blog where they awarded it Burger of the Year 2010. It certainly got me thinking; surely a glorified HIACE couldn’t stand up to the likes of Huxtaburger, NOSHRY, and The Bottom End could it? Boy, how wrong was I.

The concept is simple: Get the best, freshest and tastiest ingredients and a tank full of 91 octane, find a suitable location, send out a tweet, ???,  Profit. It’s so ridiculous in its simplicity; perfect in its execution. No bookings, no waiting lists, no giving your table away, no obnoxious drunks laughing a metre away from your table. It was my dream restaurant. No overpriced drinks; hell, bring whatever you fancy. Sit wherever you want. Give your child a ball to go kick around. The park was full of people just enjoying the swan song of another week gone by. How had nobody thought of this before?

Beatbox Kitchen

Work friday as is usually the case; was frantic. 7pm finally came, i grabbed my 6 cans of freshly arrived Peroni Red, complete with a couple of brown paper bags (To complete the drinking booze after sunset in the park look) and headed home to get changed. 7:45 came, my girlfriend Lydia arrived and we got in the car and headed towards Rathdowne St; the fixed location of Beatbox Kitchen (BBK) on a Friday evening. Driving in, I was mildly nervous. After all, the BBK had set up shop at 6pm and I was worried that by the time we got down there they would be all but sold out. Nervousness was quickly overshadowed by anger, as a pounding of the steering wheel let Lydia know I had forgotten something; and when I let her know the Peronis were still sitting in my fridge at  home we had a quiet next couple of minutes driving in as I had a different kind of twinkle in my eye.

The first thing you notice is the scores of people sitting down eating, chatting and laughing. Then you hear the music, the reasonably quiet but unforgettably retro tunes banging out of the beatbox. Then you see the bright yellow halo of light emanating from the truck much the same as the almost intoxicating smell of exclusively grass-fed patties and fresh bread (Baked locally earlier that day). The fries simply singing out to you with their charm, and as we neared the front of the truck I knew we would be in for something special.

People queuing for burgers.

We both ordered the standard fare beef burger ($11), and a serving of fries ($5) with their signature “stereo sauce” (Read: Herbed Mayo). Whilst a vegetarian option is available, I think you are missing the point if you head here without plans of digesting one of Tasmania’s finest. I was almost pleased to hear there was a 25 minute wait for our order (No doubt testament to the incredible demand) which gave me time to scout out some nearby beers. We headed to the Railway Hotel around the corner and grabbed some Asahi ($4.50). The timing was perfect as upon our return within 3-4 minutes our meals were ready.

We picked a spot on the near-capacity lawns of Park Rd, crossed our fingers hoping for the best and dug in.

Beatbox Burgers

The first bite is what seals the deal. As you bite into the moist, incredibly fresh patty the medley of fresh bread, lovely gouda cheese, the usual assortment of tomato/lettuce and that oh-so-addictive stereo sauce radiates through the palate. Euphoria follows as you begin to question what more in a burger you could possibly extract. I’m saying this as an adult who can comfortably admit I have never eaten a meal on the floor since at least grade 5. They were simply incredible. The fries, a refreshing change from the disappointment of Huxtaburger fries some weeks before. It hit all the right notes and left us incredibly satisfied. 9pm came and the crew begin to wind down, the clattering of counting coins no doubt a sign of the days success. The burger van had came. It had conquered. Could this be my new Melbourne #1? Just maybe.

Enjoy it. I certainly did!

Appeal (3/3):
Had always been on my radar after always being abreast of their location through twitter. Certainly had my curiously aptly piqued after The Burger Adventure gave it top gong in 2010.

Design(3/3):
What’s not to like about a nondescript food cart, vast expanses of parkland and the ability to tailer your night to however you fancy. Very solid.

Service(3/3):
The van-staff were well versed in the art of taming the horde; service often suffers as a result of high volumes of traffic but not here.

Food(4/5):
2 burgers. One meat, one veg option. Fries were delectable. Burger maybe a touch over-salted but otherwise flawless.

Drink(3/3):
Coke and water on the menu. $0 corkage to bring whatever-the-hell you’d like; you’re in a public park after all.

Overall: 
5 stars.

Would I return?
I’m already counting down the days. As close to In-N-Out as you’re likely to get south of the equator. Go now!